Reading Reading...

Kent: "Sometimes I get sick of reading about lesbians. Is that bad?"
Crystal: "Sometimes I would get sick of reading about Africans."

There are limits...

Kai: Can I call you Granola Crunch?

Treacy: You can call me whatever you want!

Kent: Can I call you vagina-face?

Treacy: No. At least not in public.

Kent: You have an ex???
Crystal: Yes.
Kent: Sorry, I just think of you as-
Crystal: Celibate?
Kent: Yes.

Sox Games

(upon hearing the game announcer mention the sunny weather at Yankee Stadium)

Crystal: "Of course it's sunny there. It's Hell. It's from the fire!"

(Trying to help Hannah make up a logic puzzle)

Crystal: Three Talboteers walk into a bar...no, that's a true story.

Roommate Contract

From the topics covered in this kit, what are some areas you feel we may have significant differences?

Kent: "You're a boy."
Kai: "You're a Jew."

True Story.

(via AIM)
Kai: "Wanna go to the liquor store?"
Lola: "Silly question. Let me put on a bra."

Common Sense

Kent: "I'm trying to see if he's a Republican. It says, 'Political Views: Common Sense.' He's a Democrat."

boobs!

Treacy: I invited Marta.

Kent: To come see my boobs?

Gifts that are Weird to Give

Crystal: "On Facebook, I got this message that says 'This person has just sent you a horse. Would you like to give one back?' "
Kent: "You should accept it!"
Crystal: "No! Because then she'll give me a farm, and that's something I don't want!"

This Is What Happens After COllege

Crystal: "What are those things called?"
Kent: "A book?"

And the Awkward Returns...

(Marta, standing awkwardly)
Marta: "This feels natural."
Kai: "That should NEVER feel natural..."

(Marta, sitting on Treacy's lap)
Marta: "Did you just LICK my BACK?!"
Treacy: "No! I nuzzled it!"